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Avoidance

I know I know I haven't written in a whole lot in the last week. I suppose because not much as happened in my life. I can't imagine writing every day especially its a repeat from the day before. I suppose I really would write when something new pops up or is interesting to me. My eating has been curbed for sure due to the blog....its keeping honest and my guilt factor of eating fast food is huge and is making me think about food choices a lot more than I use to which is all great. I'm still in a slump about exercising. I always have good intentions but don't live up to the hype I have built about my "move-my-fat-ass plan". Which of course brings on my guilt. Ughhhh
On a totally different note, my close friends over the years have heard of the crazy dreams I have. So tell me please, why do I keep having ones about love ones dying! So far in the last two weeks I've had two about my grandma dying (RIP MJL Nov. '08) and right before I woke up this morning I had one about my dad! This kinda freaked me out since my dad is still living. It was kinda odd. It was all about this underground grieving apartment. Yes that's right, you are taken underground where the casket lays in a room surrounded with photos and mementos and then you go into a apartment/dorm-like setting. There is even a cafeteria. I woke up when my mom came and got me to go back to the grieve room. ......SO FREAKIN' WIERD!!! And its makin me freak out about....me and my wild imagination...ughhhh
I think I'm in a funk of some kind. I could use a good fun party with lots of people I at least half know and I want to get out of control/loosen up a bit....put down the guard rails....step out of the comfort zone....etc...you know what I mean. Lordy lordy lordy.....
Ok...well its yet again crazy busy at work so I'm off to get to it.
More later...
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